Let's start with a quote... and I want you to think long and hard about it.

This quote, pretty much sums up the whole scope of regrets and holding back.

- Mark Twain

Event-Wise

The above quote speaks loud and clear. It is the basis for which we live life and avoid regrets. However, there is on emotion, above all others, that contributes to our feelings of regret... fear.

Fear is our enemy.

Fear is one of the central causes of regretting our lives.

Fear prevents us from making life altering choices.

Fear keeps us inside a tiny bubble where routine keeps us feeling safe and secure.

Living life behind the comforts of what we know, will get us absolutely no where; there is, virtually, no excitement in routine. In order to get the most out of, what may be, our only chance at living, we need to always go with the more dangerous path. Sure, if you're happy living within your bubble, then by all means, stay there... but, look inside yourself, if you have but a tiny SHRED of curiosity about what could be, deep down you know that you're completely wasting your life. You have to act now and avoid regretting a lifetime of nothing but an ordinary cycle of routine.

I recall having a conversation with someone; they were unhappily married to a cheater, or something of the sorts. I asked her why she didn't divorce him already. She said she was fearful for what he might do. To paraphrase, I told her...

"For all we know, this could be our only life. Given the fact this may be our only chance to experience happiness, we should do everything in our power to live how our hearts feel. Otherwise, we're essentially throwing everything away."

Listen, at the risk of sounding pessimistic, we're all destined to die; there is nothing we can do about that. Ultimately, there is no purpose with paving a safer path to death.

Fill your path with excitement

Fill it with all that you've ever thought about doing

Every road of every person leads to the same destination... death. The only difference is how we get there. You can either reach the end safely, with little to no turbulence and have nothing to show for it but curiosity of what might have been... or, you can risk getting there sooner, but with desires fulfilled and regrets eliminated.

Emotion-Wise

Life isn’t easy nor is it meant to be. There will be many times where we look back and say, “Why was I so stupid?” We will stumble, we will fall, but to question why we were the way we were is just silly. Had it not been for our past mistakes, we wouldn’t be where we are today. With each obstacle that  knocks us down, we’re able to get back up and remember, “Okay! I have to do this next time.” and, “Right, I shouldn’t think that way, or else it’ll happen again.” You see, it’s our mistakes that enable us to learn and develop into better versions of ourselves. Each fall serves as a life lesson, we just have to have our eyes open to it.

Let me ask you this...

Let’s say you were never questioned and everything came into your possession like *finger snap* that. What kind of person do you think you’d turn out to be? How much knowledge would you have lost comparing who you are now, to who you’d be if that example were true. If you were to meet that kind of person, who was used to everything going the way they wanted, no one to ever question them, what would be your thoughts? You’d probably have zero respect for them. This is how going through life, going through all of the turmoil, pushing past our limits, helps us better understand who we are. The journey through life, you have to learn to appreciate it for all the lessons it has to teach us for our own benefit.

A lot of the times, people can’t look past what they’ve done. So they dwell on it, wishing with all of their being how things should be different, how it wasn’t their fault. Time passes them by, and they still can’t come to terms with it, so they miss out on that, and all the other life lessons they could have learned, but didn’t, because they’re so stuck on the past. You mustn’t let the past consume you. It may hurt for a little bit, but if you don’t look past it, you won’t grow as a person. That mistake you wish you could take back, it’s in the past now, there’s nothing you can do about it but try to look towards the lesson that mistake held. That’s the true form of all mistakes, a life goal. Don’t keep your eyes closed to it, look past the terrible effects of your actions towards the life lesson that will help improve yourself. You mustn’t force a punishment onto yourself just for being human. No one deserves that, and neither should you.

If you’re a gamer, think of an awesome Role Playing Game.

Role Playing Games tell the story of a group of people who undergo a lot of life’s trials in order to reach their goal, that goal is usually saving the world, but whatever. In the beginning of the game, the characters often times have a lot of issues they need to work out. The trials associated with their journey serves to teach them lessons about their life and themselves and by the end of the game, they’re a totally different person.

Let’s look at Luke Fon Fabre (Tales of the Abyss); an aristocrat who has been spoiled his whole life.

This life of luxury has caused him to become a jerk with hardly any manners. Eventually, he ends up traveling with a group of people with noble ambitions. Luke‘s ambitions, on the other hand, are more self-centered, wanting only to be praised as a hero. As a result of this thinking, he involuntarily causes the deaths of hundreds of people. Though, instead of taking the blame, due to his spoiled past, he opts to point fingers. This causes a very large disconnection between himself and his companions, whom completely abandon him emotionally. Now, because Luke isn’t used to taking the blame, he is left all alone to wonder why everyone has abandoned him. It isn’t until he acknowledges the error behind his thinking does he grow into a better person.

A good story, but, in cases of tragic regrets. Learning the lesson may not be good enough. If you’re like me, you’d probably seek to punish yourself in the most cruelest of fashions, be that total isolation or whatnot.

“I can’t forgive myself for what I’ve done.”

Assuming a catastrophe was accidental, the road to redemption starts from within. You’re aim is to probably make up for all the harm you’ve caused. Perhaps seeking to redeem yourself in the eyes of the victims, but, you must first forgive yourself.

In the end though, no matter WHAT you did, the path to redemption starts from within. In order for you to move on, you have to forgive yourself before others are willing to forgive you. Don’t seek to punish yourself, that’s no way to redeem yourself, and no way to make things right again.

Further Reading…

7 Ways to Live Life to the Max

Once upon a time, there was a fisherman who never put a lid on his basket of lobsters. When asked was he not afraid of them climbing over the edge and getting away, he said, "Heck no, the moment one makes a bid for freedom all of the others drag him back in".

The lobsters are in the form of parents, children, relatives, friends, work associates, those in authority, etc. who, though well intentioned, will attempt to discourage you from your ambitions.

The greatest gift you have been given is the freedom to make choices. Use this gift to its maximum. You have in front of you the key to secret wisdom. If you use it, you will unlock the secret to having all your dreams come true.